Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
