sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
