New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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