ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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