sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
