Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
