Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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