Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
