i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
