physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
