You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
