Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
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