YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
