dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
