You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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