More tranny stories later!
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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