I heard we made out
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
