We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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