You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize