before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
