You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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