Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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