At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
