Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
