you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
