I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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