Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Your penis caused this!
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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