is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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