worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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