That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
