Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
