dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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