Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize
