How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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