last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
