9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
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