her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
