We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
