he shaved USA in his pubs
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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