Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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