im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
