beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
