Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
