So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
