keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize