hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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