I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
