Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
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