I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
He is an equal opportunity slut.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
