i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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