Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
