So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize